Is Venting Good for Us?

There is no denying the immense role that venting to release anger plays in our lives, with many of us actively engaging in venting, while others adopt different strategies to deal with their daily frustrations. Regardless, there’s an assumption that venting is a good and healthy thing to do – that it is supposed to release all the pent-up fury that has accumulated over time and refresh your system, allowing you to continue living your life, unburdened by any random angry tendencies that may cross your mind. But is venting actually useful in guiding our emotional responses, or is this just another myth about the mind?

While the science has not yet reached a consensus, the evidence suggests that that venting may not be as helpful as many of us believe it to be. There is much research that supports the claim that venting is not a healthy way to release anger, though in specific circumstances it may provide some benefits for regulating emotion. It seems to depend on how you vent, as people may vent in many different ways, from writing a lengthy Facebook post to punching holes in the wall. To better understand when venting is and isn’t helpful, it is useful to consider the two main types of venting separately: individual venting and interpersonal venting.

Individual venting 

Individual venting—being any forceful expression of emotion that is devoid of social interaction, whether physical, verbal, or written—has been linked to elevations in anger, despite popular belief which champions its revitalising capabilities. One study found that those who engaged in physical venting by punching a punching bag did not become less angry, but actually displayed increased aggression afterwards. Those in the control group, who were not told to actively reduce their anger, had the lowest levels of anger and aggressive responding. The authors suggested that by partaking in aggressive behaviours as a venting outlet, we practise being angry. This acts to consolidate angry thoughts and feelings by constantly reminding ourselves of the situation, and as a result we become more volatile rather than less angry. 

Studies investigating other forms of venting (see study 1, study 2, or study 3), such as written and verbal expression (which are relevant to angrily posting on social media, for example), yielded similar conclusions on how venting reinforces negative thoughts and emotions. Therefore, irrespective of the chosen venting outlet, the prevailing evidence supports the notion of individual venting as an unhealthy habit, disputing its endorsement as a beneficial anger management strategy in our daily lives. 

Interpersonal venting

Interpersonal venting, where someone expresses their emotions in some form of social interaction, has a greater potential as an effective short-term emotion regulation strategy, depending on both the identity of the receiver and the nature of their response. In contrast to individual venting, interpersonal venting involves a reciprocal component, also meaning that it’s important to choose the right people to vent to. One study found that venting to a 3rd party (someone who was not involved in the situation that provoked the emotion) could help you feel better, and even more so if their responses were reinforcing (emphasising internal and controllable causes, such as the offender’s naturally toxic personality) rather than reinterpreting (emphasising external and uncontrollable causes, such as circumstantial factors). Though it was determined that the emotional impacts of these responses barely varied for 3rd parties, with people feeling more content as long as they received a response. Most of us have probably had the experience of being on the receiving end of these rants, and may have witnessed for ourselves how after cycling through the usual responses of ‘oh really’, ‘wow’, and ‘that sucks’, the venter becomes more calm. 

However, the same study suggests that when venting by engaging directly with the offender themselves, the response received plays a crucial role in either fuelling or abating the venter’s anger. If the offender reinforces, for example by ascribing the situation to the offender’s own characteristic behaviour, it may be unsurprising that this can act to exacerbate the venter’s anger and escalate the situation. Alternatively, offenders who reinterpret, for example suggesting a consideration for their perspective as well as environmental circumstances, can ease the frustrations of the venter. Interestingly, these responses evoke opposite reactions in comparison to 3rd party venting, with another key difference being the significance of the offender’s response in predicting extreme variations in the venter’s level of anger. Though, venting in this situation was still less effective than a dialogue with an impartial 3rd party, prompting the conclusion that consulting a 3rd party is the most sensible and least risky option when harbouring an overwhelming urge to vent. 

It is important to remember that this only seems to be effective in regulating transient emotional states, rather than long-term moods, meaning that interpersonal venting may help you feel better in the short term, but you may still have the same underlying anger and bitterness from the altercation. In this way, venting can be perceived as the emotional equivalent of adding ice to a hot beverage; the surface might be cooled, but everything else is still very much hot.  

Healthier venting substitutes 

Whilst the evidence suggests that venting can be helpful in some circumstances, other emotion regulation techniques have been shown to be very effective in pacifying anger.

Reappraisal is a popular and effective emotion regulation strategy that involves changing the way we think about a situation in order to mitigate any persisting negative feelings around it. For example, when someone inevitably misspells your name at a Starbucks, instead of getting mad, you could reappraise the situation and feel less angry at their sheer creativity. The great utility of reappraisal is that it can eliminate the need for venting entirely through the simple but tedious process of generating other possible explanations to rationalise irrational behaviour, potentially saving you from lawsuits and bouts of high blood pressure. 

Another alternative to venting is mindfulness, which involves non-judgemental awareness of one’s thoughts and experiences in the present moment. Mindfulness can be practiced in a diverse range of situations—ranging from yoga to colouring and, most notably, meditation. Its unifying focus is to orient your attention on your current thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations to create a sense of serenity and interconnectedness with yourself. 

Multiple studies (e.g. study 1, study 2, and study 3) suggest that mindfulness exercises promote positive emotions whilst decreasing negative emotions, with attenuations in anger and hostility observed following mindfulness sessions. This practice is more of a continuous lifestyle ritual than a tool employed following a particularly infuriating predicament, and it echoes the benefits of reappraisal in that it prevents the desire to vent by encouraging you to observe your thoughts and emotions more objectively. However, during periods of great distress and emotion, incorporating basic mindfulness exercises are still useful in returning yourself to a calmer state, but it does require some self-control and discipline to be effective. 

Conclusion

Day to day frustrations are not uncommon for most people, with annoyances as trivial as receiving full cream instead of skim milk in your coffee, to more substantial events such as losing your job, and they can all add to the repository of bitterness and resentment within us. The practice of venting as a solution has long persisted over time, with the notion that it is beneficial being an almost universal belief, though it’s supposed efficacy in extinguishing anger is rarely challenged. Approaches such as mindfulness and cognitive reappraisal are arguably better alternatives, though they are generally underutilised because people are unaware of these options, or for the same reason that we jaywalk or choose TV over exercising - we are lazy creatures, and often favour convenience over what’s best for us. However, investing the proper time and effort in these strategies can engender a range of health benefits beyond anger management, with mindfulness linked to reductions in anxiety, depression and negative emotion along with a greater quality of life. Though a word of advice - in the case that someone is venting to you, for your sake and theirs, please don’t tell them to ‘calm down,’ or you may become the punching bag.